Leadership Inner Driven – By Diane Lazarowicz – Top Performance Results, LLC
In part one of this three-part series on Leadership Inner Driven, we took the first step toward becoming inner-driven leaders by discussing Personal Competence.
We determined our top five core values, which gave us a deeper understanding of what we deem important. Next, we developed our personal mission statement, which guided us toward recognizing our purpose. And, last, we became authentic leaders by aligning our core values with our personal mission.
In part two of this series, we will discuss Inner Driven Leadership from a social perspective. Social Competence involves exploring how well we are in tune with people and their thoughts and feelings. We will examine some of the critical social skills that make up our social competence. In addition, we will look at how these social skills play out with our ability to mentor others and inspire teams.
Leadership Inner Driven: Social Part
When our social skills are at their peak, an environment exists to build strong, genuine relationships. So, let us begin our social awareness journey by determining where we stand with these critical social skills. Ask yourself the following questions:
- When I am wrong, I avoid admitting it or attempt to convince others that I am not wrong. (Trust & Honesty)
- I am sensitive to the needs of others. (Empathy)
- When someone is dragging out the details of their story, I become frustrated and wish they would move it along. (Patience)
- When someone is talking to me, I am thinking about my response to what they are saying. (Active Listening)
- If debating an issue, I already have decided the outcome before they have completed their sentence. (Open Minded)
If you answered “Yes” to any of these questions, some attention is needed to these social skills:
- Trust & Honesty: Build trust by being honest, present, and open to admitting mistakes. Trust, once broken, is difficult to regain.
- Empathy: Put yourself in others’ shoes. While you may not fully understand their experience, the attempt builds rapport.
- Patience: Stress often leads to impatience. Try meditation, breathing exercises, and better time management.
- Active Listening: Avoid distractions. Make eye contact, paraphrase responses, and listen with full attention.
- Open Minded: Value and validate others’ ideas. Avoid shutting them down prematurely.
DiSC Model
To measure your social communication skills, I recommend taking a DiSC Assessment. Based on the work of Dr. William Marston, this model helps leaders understand their style and work more effectively with others.
Workshop Example
At one of my leadership workshops, we demonstrated mentoring with a cardboard shoe and lace. The leader began explaining, but when the mentee struggled, she completed the task herself. This was a powerful lesson — mentoring means guiding, not doing.
When mentoring, be patient and give clear instructions. Don’t take over.
Three Questions to Keep Mentorship on Track
- What are you working on right now?
- What are your next steps?
- How can I help?
These questions support team development and reinforce the importance of social skills in leadership. Sincere praise and recognition also go a long way in keeping a team engaged.
This concludes part two in our three-part series on Inner Driven Leadership. We explored social competence, mentoring, and the DiSC model.
In the next article, we’ll examine Behavioral Competence: goal setting, long-range planning, and lifelong learning.
Diane Lazarowicz is an award-winning executive coach and communication and leadership expert. She helps women trust their inner voice through the delivery of strong communication and leadership. Diane has over 35 years of experience, is a Suma Cum Laude graduate of Robert Morris University, and serves on the Board of Directors for the Pittsburgh Airport Chamber of Commerce.
